By Danny Picard
BOSTON — The Boston Bruins need Brad Marchand.
Let me make that perfectly clear, before you accuse me of trying to run him out of town. That, I am not.
The Bruins need Marchand. So I will not even listen to a conversation about a potential trade. I don’t care what you have coming back in return. He’s untouchable. You can’t have him. Marchand is not going anywhere.
But he needs to stop licking people on the ice.
Before you blow a gasket, I should stress that I’m not calling for a suspension or even a penalty during a game if it happens again. I’m just simply calling for it to, well, not happen again.
I’m not the only one. The NHL spoke to Marchand and the Bruins during their second-round playoff series against the Tampa Bay Lightning last week, after Marchand licked Ryan Callahan as if Callahan’s nose was a popsicle.
To be honest, it’s crazy that I even have to pussyfoot around this subject, in an attempt to convince people in Boston that licking somebody on the ice during a hockey game is ridiculous.
Can you imagine if Yanni Gourde dragged his tongue up Patrice Bergeron’s schnoz? Everyone in this town would want Gourde kicked out of the league. He’d have to delete his twitter. Crown him our newest villain. We’d hate his guts and call him a little weasel.